Sunday, May 6, 2012

Endings and beginnings.

I’m going to be honest.  The last couple of weeks were rough.

Nothing went the way I had planned.  I watched as everything I set out to do on my own crashed and burned.  I guess somewhere deep down, I knew that I was about to give up three weeks for God, and I selfishly convinced myself that He owed me two easy weeks of things going my way.  Finally, I realized that He was teaching me dependence.  And I had fought him every step of the way.
And this all since my last blog entry. 
It really scares me how quickly I forget sometimes.
Thankfully, I’m not God, and He is.  He never forgot me.  He continued to teach me and guide me.  Though I was frustrated and angry at Him for not allowing my plans to come to fruition, His plan went on unfazed, unhindered, and unimpeded by my selfish pride.  And when He revealed this to me, He brought me right where He wants me to be:  dependent.
At that moment I knew that He was readying me for a fresh start: a new beginning born from the end of myself.  As I reached the end of myself, my self was ended, and I began to live in Him.  This is how the Lord works.  He makes beginnings out of endings.
Today is the beginning of our journey to Belfast.  I feel like the journey will itself prove to be the beginning of many things.  It’s also the end of many things.  It’s the end of another year of school, of months of stress and procrastination and planning, and of weeks of running from God.
I’m sure that in the coming weeks spent across the Eastern sea, I’ll be writing a lot about what I begin to see the Lord doing in my life.  The sooner I accept that my plans will always come to an end, the better off and happier I’ll be when I find that I’m still part of His perfect timing and infallible plan.  May God always wreck my plans, so that I may more clearly see His.  The end of this blog is the beginning of so much more.

- Sam R. Franklin
(11 hours till Belfast)
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." - Jeremiah 29:11

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